Overheard from two old guys at the next table:

When you see a hearse heading towards the cemetery
you don’t ever see an armored car following behind it!

Spend it now becuase you can’t take it with you!

I got a chuckle out of that…

Jill Twiss always makes me laugh. Lately she’s had a lot of great posts so check out her site, in particular I really liked her recent Google thinks I’m a terrible person post….

This is a great parody of “Rock Band” sung to the tune of “Roxanne”.

Found at nehatiwari.com after catching her segment on PopSiren. A Revision3.com production.

If this isn’t the cutest review of episode 4 that you’ve ever seen…

I’m sure a few parts were re-shot, but it’s adorable…

Here’s another cute kid video…

If you’ve ever helped anyone with a computer you’ll love this! This is can also be referred to as “The Medieval Helpdesk“.

This is in Norwegian, so you can probably turn the volume down, but it’s subtitled. I just watched this with a bunch of technology directors and we were all laughing out loud.

Why is Doing Taxes like Having An Orgasm…?

Because while I can do it myself, I’d much rather have someone else do it for me!

This is so cool! An orchestra composed of fresh vegetables for instruments!! They show the shopping, the making and the playing…

I found this over at Mrs. Who’s blog.

“I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” is one of my favorite songs. And that’s what I got! As I present I got a certificate that I’ve adopted a Hippo at the Detroit Zoo. I’ve got a Hippo, a certificate and background (see the photo).

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas is a Christmas novelty song written by John Coctoasten and performed by Gayla Peevey (10 or 11 years old at the time) in 1953. You can listen here or at the iTunes music store.

This is a favorite Christmas song of mine and I remember it being on a holiday Mix tape that Jim (a co-worker) made one year. It was a few years before it got re-popularized about 10 years ago (maybe from an Ally McBeal episode).

Plus, it includes a trip to the zoo, which (once I go) crosses another item off my 101 in 1001 list…

I thought this was hysterical!!!!
I stole this from Jodi at faster pussycat… type! type!.

It’s only 4 seconds so give it a look see…

Click here if it doesn’t play….

Hint – It’s an anagram. And it’s cute (and geeky), so don’t watch it if that doesn’t appeal to you…

My worry would be what if you didn’t get the answer you wanted…“Serge Gandaora”, the make believe artist, is actually another anagram – “George and Sara”

I thought this was funny. I usually ignore these but I clicked this one…

It was titled Funny Father Daughter Dance “A Wonderful White Wedding”. It takes a minute to get to the good part but it’s definitely different for a wedding.

On a (completely unrelated) side note Wedding Crashers is a kinda funny candid camera show on Monday Nights. You need to fast forward through the talking parts but the practical jokes are pretty good. If you’ve only seen it this week, try it again this weeks episode was kinda weak…

HA! Never heard that one before!!!!

“The early bird may get the worm,
but the second mouse gets the cheese”
– Wendy’s MySpace Page

I Googled it and found all sorts of references but didn’t see an original source.

I saw this on Google and thought it was pretty funny, so I’m sharing it with you…
What I thought was extra strange was Google doesn’t seem to have a decent way to share the code as easily as YouTube does. So I ended up getting it from YouTube instead. Google will post directly to Blogger, TypePad, MySpace or LiveJournal (and you need to give them your password!) but YouTube just gives me a line of code to past on my site…

I’m not sure if this was a recent episode but I just saw this Wired post with screen captures and thought it was pretty funny!

Stolen from Dean’s World.

I laughed so hard when I watched this the waitress had to come see what was so funny.

I liked this

Plans are useless, but planning is invaluable.
- Winston Churchill

I stole this from Sizzle’s…

It reminds me of

Man Plans… God laughs…

But I’m not sure who said it. Einstein?

I’m sure they thought it would look cool to film their buddy doing this…

Posted by Jon

I hope they don’t show the video to the insurance company…

So it’s been a while since I’ve been to McSweeney’s Internet Tendency’s (they make up funny lists). So here’s a few good ones:

So Weird Al has a new video for his song called White And Nerdy from his new album Straight Outta Lynwood. If you’re into science, computers and other dorky stuff, I hope you can laugh at yourself when you watch this one…

So have you seen the guy do the Magic Quarter Trick?
I don’t post many YouTube type things but this one needed to be shared…

From Don’t Forward.

So when I was in one of the hotels in Egypt I saw this “hieroglyphic” sign and it struck me as funny so I took a photo of it.

Just had to try this since all the cool kids are doing embedded links like this to YouTube:
And yes it’s totally stupid, but still, I laughed pretty hard when I watched it…

Found at Nicole’s.

I promise any future links to YouTube will not be this huge ugly embedded display. It’ll be a little link like this or an embedded image like on the right…

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor’s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

“Impossible!” says the doctor. “Show me.”

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, “You’re not really a redhead, are you?

”Well, no,“ she said, ”I’m actually a blonde.“

I thought so,” the doctor said.

“Your finger is broken.”

Stolen from Tawcan at Confessions of a Monkey.

Not a big blonde joke fan but this is the best blonde joke ever. And you know I don’t often tell jokes…

“I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every
other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the
locks, they are always locking three.”

–Elayne Boosler

Here’s another…

“Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I’m halfway through my
fishburger and I realize, Oh my God….I could be eating a slow learner.”
–Lynda Montgomery

From Don’t Forward.

I just read the funnies from Sunday and I thought this was absolutely hysterical!!! I’m still laughing at this while I write this.

This silly thing is, that it probably wouldn’t make that much of a difference in the long run, I know people like it different temperatures but if they’re both cold they’re both gonna turn it up they’re both going to get warm. (But I’m still laughing)

So I like Jill Twiss’s Blog, it’s called “The World of Jill Twiss:Where Good Things Are Good and Bad Things Are Comedy Material”, it’s generally pretty funny and I’ve had her on my blogroll for a while. I’d go see her if I knew she was ever in the Detroit area or I was in her area. There’s a video on-line of her, it’s stand up and the lighting is awful not so great but you can hear her just fine so go take a look.

Samantha will tell you all you need to know about Dog Condoms. She’s got a funny cartoon too. (That’s all I’ve got to say about the matter).

Check out Chapter Titles From My Creationist Textbook at McSweeney’s.

Klingon Fairy Tales and Things Hagrid Would Say If He Served Jesus Instead of Harry Potter are pretty funny too.

This site, with it’s lists of lists always cracks me up!

So when I was a kid the local movie theater, in lieu of cartoons, would show short documentary type shows. These 3-7 minute shorts might be on skatboarding, mountian climbing or any old thing (some were new, some were old). The one I’ll always remember is about the annual Swiss Spaghetti Harvest, they show how they harvest the spaghetti trees and lay it out to dry. You can watch a low quality version (in RealPlayer) and you’ll get the idea of it.

Update: I noticed the direct link (click the image) was broken. So I’m moving this back up towards the top so you can take a gander if you missed it the first time.

I knew it was a joke but it was totally deadpan. It wasn’t until years later I learned it was part of a (normally serious) BBC show they showed on April 1st, 1957. Here’s some more info and background. Why am I bringing this up today? Because the link hasn’t worked for ages and it’s working today so I thought I’d add a smile to your day. It’s believed to be one of the first times television was used for a April Fools Joke. Here’s a little more info from the Museum of Hoaxes.

August 1st or April 1st, any day is good for a joke.

Does anyone have access or know where I can get (purchase) a higher quality version of this?!?

So the other day I saw this cRaZy car. It’s got these wild colors and weird junk stuff glued all over the car, like shells, pencils, dolls, painted bottle-caps and more than I can list here. So of course I took some pictures (click for larger versions), but when I got home they didn’t come out at all (it looked like the lens cover didn’t open all the way). I was pretty disappointed since I was trying to show someone the photos when I discovered they were duds…

Fast-forward to a week later. Guess what I saw!?!?! You got it, the cRaZy car! If you look hard at the enlarged version you can see the back wiper blade is a baby doll’s arm. It’s just completely bizzaro and I saw it twice in a week in different areas of the metro-Detroit area…